Tales of the Incredible Hoke Robertson

While enjoying the beautiful weather and putting the last touches on the Oracle boat for the upcoming America's Cup race in San Francisco I was reminded of an adventure I had many years ago. It was 1963 and I was a crew member of the good ship Calypso, which as everyone knows was the research and exploration vessel of Jacques Cousteau, the pioneer of SCUBA and world renowned naturalist. We were doing the first in-depth study of killer whales or orcus horribilus near the Farallon Islands off the coast of California. We were the first scientists to dive with these magnificent creatures, and I was working on developing the first dictionary of whale and orca sounds with the hopes of communicating with these marine mammals.

Unfortunately, one day the cook had a little too much wine before dinner (ah, the French) and forgot to light the propane stove after he'd turned it on. The eventual explosion disabled both the engines and destroyed our communications gear leaving us adrift with little outlook for help. I asked Captain Cousteau if I could try to get to ashore for help and outlined my plan. He was a bit skeptical and concerned for my safety, but eventually agreed as we had little choice. Adrift near those islands presented no small danger to the ship and crew should the winds shift a few degrees.

Anyway, I chummed the water until the local orca pod arrived for a free meal all the while inflating my diving gloves after sealing the openings with duct tape. I also grabbed a hula hoop the crew used for recreation. When a big male got close to the ship, I jumped onto his back and grabbed his large dorsal fin. The orca's first reaction was to dive and shake me off but as I had quickly shoved both inflated gloves into his blowhole preventing him from closing it, he dared not dive for fear of inhaling water; the orca's biggest fear.

Off the orca sped with me perched atop his back clinging like a barnacle to pier! As I held on I used my Leatherman tool’s saw blade to cut the hula hoop and then bent it until it was sort of a curved hollow tube. In order to turn the orca, I would put one end of the hula hoop into the water and the other into my mouth. I would then "hum" the orca sound for "left" or "right" until he adjusted his bearing to stay on the easterly course towards San Francisco. It worked like a charm and in only two short hours I was within swimming distance of the Alameda Naval Air Station. As I removed the gloves from his blowhole I noticed that the annual Alcatraz to SF swim happened to be underway, so I joined the hearty participants and completed that event before again swimming across the Bay to the NAS. Once the Marine Guards saw who I was, I was quickly able to explain the situation and the US Navy saved the day. Although I had finished first in Alcatraz swim, I declined the gold medal given that I had not started from the island.

Anyway, the Navy was extremely interested in my ability to communicate with marine mammals, but that is another story for another day. HOKE ROBERTSON